Tuesday, April 12, 2005


Well today was fun. By fun, I mean NOT fun. We all went to the tattoo parlor and only one of the people I was with could get a tattoo... the other friend was quite annoyed... and then I began to wonder why I was even there. To wait in the waiting room listening to the metallic buzzing coming from over the wall for 2 hours? The rest of the night turned out like that... we were all supposed to watch a movie and didn't end up doing so... I feel so powerless when my friends make plans because I have a hard time speaking up and suggesting things. So now I'm at home wondering what the heck I did with my night.

Sigh. I'm having a hard time with God right now. I have to be honest... I'm feeling disappointed with how things are going for me. I'm not going to be super-specific here, but I feel like God is so freaking complicated. People are always saying, "you have to reach this point in your life before God will allow THIS to happen, you have to think a certain way before he opens these doors for you...", bla bla bla. If God really does work that way, then I have no idea how I'm ever going to receive the things I've dreamed my whole life about. I just feel overwhelmed with my own weakness, and I'm so afraid that God won't meet me here. I've been here for a long, long time.

Okkkkkk, that was open of me. Being open on a blog is pretty dang easy. That's enough from me for now.

Except for the fact that "Transatlanticism" by Deathcab for Cutie is a freakin' good song. Download it!


betha_boo 10:50 AM  

deathcab for cutie are freaking cool. And so are you. I am sorry you are feeling that way dear annie louise. I don't know what to say, but I trust that you will find answers and such that you are looking for. I do love thee...and I do wish for a visit from thee. I was thinking last night of ways that I could get down there to visit...but the bus is so fricking expensive. I would rather give you gas money to get up here...sigh...

have a wonderful, far more eventful day than last.